dope nose.

download this shit.

pornstars are people.

(fist) deep.

nov 8th

gem.

i can't stop watching this.

there are so many levels of awesome.

when your religion has an ill ass marketing team, you know something is up.

spike jonze.

check it.

new yorkers really love talking about how they're from new york. and that where they are from is the most righteous place on earth.

you know who else does that? terrorists.

... and UCLA alums

observation.

i haven't brushed up on my LGBT politics in a while but from the looks of it, homosexuality is more of a degenerative disease than a life choice.

but to the gay community-- i commend you on having lady gaga as your poster child instead of this wench. your slogan should be "check mate."

listen kid.

i get it. you might be a child prodigy or you might just be a malnourished 14 year old chinese gymnast; who's to say?

lemme just explain something to you. i don't like where this is going. asians singing jason mraz will soon be outlawed as soon as i finish my letter to my senator. but until then, don't ever do that again. if you continue down this road you're going to end up in the church praise band, pretending to love God, when all you really want is to finger bang the fat keyboardist.

maybe that doesn't shake you to your core the way it does me. but you don't have 27 years of life under your belt the way i do. let me break it down in terms you might understand. jason mraz is only for frat boys who haven't come out of the closet yet.

do you want to end up like that ken oak guy? do you really wanna be that guy? really?

maybe i got it all wrong. maybe you're trying to be meta. asian baby singing jason mraz in baby babble... maybe... but its too cerebral... no one will get it. if you want to be meta, sing "i think i'm turning japanese" like a white guy trying to be serious-- no fob accent needed.

anyways, go sit your ass in a corner and think about your mistake... and give me your juicy juice. punk.

aint neva lie

this is my confession.

once upon a time... i used to do slam poetry.

i dare you to try and find my old livejournal page.... you won't find it... but if you did, you'd see this...

rally cry.

mix me a drink.
make it strong and i'll show u what im made of.
you think because my eyes glaze i'll forget.
i'll tell you this with clairvoyance...
i fill my veins day by day
so that once you spark me i'll spit flames.
my tongue, my weapon, like a razor's edge
i'll draw blood.

funny, you feel suppressing my senses with your
sedatives will stop me.
stop me? please. the wide infinite expanse of space
can't keep me from the cause.
i'll smooth explode with ill warning.
tear through your rallies and riots.
your meaningless ploy against me.

a decade ago i was your nameless backyard neighbor.
you welcomed me with flames and grabbing hands.
you smashed my paper thin windows and pillaged my house.
the billboards wore our pain.
spider-webbed glass glittered with
bullet holes exclaiming, "CHINK!" and "NIGGER!"
and this is my rally cry.
flickering flames grew with every breath heaved in exhaust.
with you i live and against u i stand.
disgusted, destroyed, and deserted by my brother.
mix me a drink and i'll tell you this with clairvoyance...

your anger fed me with a tainted spoon
a tonic meant to subside my ambition
I breathe deep air that singes my lungs tricked to be left open

But I, I carry more than just the belongings of my ancestors
Compassion won over a language barrier
And patience that established roots in the concrete soil of cities
I carry the burden of two worlds on one pair of shoulders
And wear the sins of misunderstanding

But I know it makes me a different color other than my skin
The inside of me bleeds American
And despite what im told I know there is truth in a smile
And humility behind a question
But this naivete is reserved for quieter moments shared between a few minds
That have the trust of a small child

I am determined to cleanse my palette
Of the bitter taste of a misdiagnosis by a nation (the cool evaporation of
your misconduct from my mind)
That sees diversity in restaurants and take out
So take out my life and mix me a drink
The tonic of a lifetime lived before me, I conform to your glass
But disperse throughout the body like a million surging voices
Longing to leave the definitions of a world tithed by words that are
meaningless
When our eyes see light and darkness
Not on skin
But when we open and close them on a long day lived
With a love and intelligence that allows sweeter release than a liquid that
quenches thirst

slimane

respect.

real talk

Verse 3

//Fuck retro! Nineties in Harlem? You'll get wet, bro
Get low or you might need assistance from your head ho
Dolo, wreaking havoc on your phono, the igniter
I'm smoking cheeba, sonny, I run with street fighters
And I'm not hearing your noise, fearing your boys playing with toys
I'm crashing with a passion, trashing and smashing decoys
Bright lights and action, y'alls, you'll beg my pardon
But you can't be a Harlem player unless you play in Harlem//

-black sheep, b.b.s, non-fiction

fetish

fashionable

dope.... but biting is some sucka shit.

korean school games

this explains a lot

nic cage understands what korean girls are for.

dear korean disgrace,

what's it like to be the the sorcerer's bitch?

xoxo

dear mr. cage,

seriously, is that the stage name you're going with? anyhow, i just called your wife a bitch. i hope that doesn't offend you. after all, i did buy a ticket on opening night for both national treasure and national treasure 2. its cool that you married this girl-- but i bet you were bummed when you found her her vagina wasn't actually sideways at all. well anyways... just make sure you don't adopt a korean baby. cuz then i'd be forced to believe you're doing 'it' intentionally.

peace kid,

i wonder what rape statistics are like in latin america. just curious.

i will call this video "rape baby." take it as you will.

og

debbie hairy (see what i did there?)

g.o.a.t

i dont know much about sports but i'm putting money down that this guy is going down as one of the greatest to ever lace up a pair of basketball appropriate footwear.

craig "i got this" hodges.

ode to graff heads